It's true, I am a wimp

I am sure that I've mentioned it before, but I am not particularly fond of snakes. For many years I spent my summers knee deep in shrubbery along side my sister and best friend as we made it out mission to catch as many garter snakes as possible. We'd place all the snakes we captured into a big garbage pail and then stare at them until my father would make us carry the pail down into the woods behind my house and let the snakes free. You would think that someone who is afraid of snakes would not actively go out and try to catch snakes, yet I did. But the image of twenty snakes gyrating against each other at the bottom of a garbage pail is something that I still have nightmares about.. As is the image of all those snakes slithering away as we tipped the pail onto its side and set them free (we played rock paper scissors to determine who the unfortunate soul would be that would get stuck with that task).
Snakes are everywhere. They hide under rocks, or leaves, or in piles of wood. They show up when you least expect them, and it's always sudden. There is no snake, and then there are twenty snakes in the blink of an eye. Well, maybe not twenty, but the point is they appear without warning. My family has a tendency to be careless in the summer months, every so often leaving the back door open just a crack in their comings and goings. On three separate occasions I have encountered snakes in my basement because of said carelessness. On three separate occasions I have hopped up on anything I could and have yelled for someone while pointing at the snake. Pointing clearly sends the message to the snake that I am dangerous and have found it out. Eventually either another member of my family will appear to pick the snake up and return it to the outdoors, or one of my parents' cats will corner it so that I can make my escape - backing away slowly, all the while pointing.
I point when I run into snakes outdoors, too. First I utter a surprised gasp, and then I point at the snake until it slides away. Why the pointing? I do not know. Maybe it just makes me feel better to know exactly where the snake is. Up until a few years ago (back before I had my dog), my parents had a black cocker spaniel who would pick snakes up and remove them from my path, or restrict their movement until I could get by. My dog does not care about snakes, as I found out yesterday upon meeting my first snake of the season.
"I did not know you would be out yet!" I cried at it and pointed. Instead of defending me from the terrifying snake (it was actually a very small snake, but that did not make it any less deadly... Unless you take into account the fact that it is non-venomous), my dog bounded by with a stick - actually driving the snake closer to me. Eventually my mother noticed that I was standing still and pointing at something so she took a short break from her gardening to move the snake and chastise me for being such a wimp.


Dunzo said...

If I'd have known that this blog promoted illegal usage of illicit substances, I would have never bookmarked it!

Goodbye and good riddance!

Megan said...

But seriously, I am assuming you meant to leave that comment on the post prior to this one since there is nothing illegal or illicit about garter snakes.
I love to promote illegal drug usage though, especially through my lack of use. I never say anything at all that implied I did anything other than drink in that post. Just because I said my friends were doing something does not mean that I did it myself. That was not promoting drug usage, it was merely mentioning it. If I'd said something like "I took a huge drag from the joint. Smoking illegal substances is awesome, everyone should do it." that would have been promoting.
Now, if you'll excuse me... I'm going to go take a huge drag from a joint. Smoking illegal substances is awesome, everyone should do it.

Dunzo said...