A Running Commentary

I live in a freezer
My room is so cold that it could easily be used as a meat locker. Actually, I vaguely recall spooning up to a shank of beef this morning before my father came and got it so that he could cook it for lunch.
As soon as it snows in here I plan on building an igloo. Maybe I'll turn on the sink later and flood the floor so I've got a nice skating rink.
I'd been losing weight for inexplicable reasons this summer, but I think I've figured it out now. My body spends so much time trying to warm itself up that I'm burning calories like crazy.
So as I turn on the tiny space heater I have purchased as a safety precaution (so that I don't lose any body parts to frostbite), I will think warm thoughts, and pray that a warm front moves into my room (which will probably, unfortunately, result in some sort of thunderstorm... but I'm willing to risk that).