I am so myopic

Yesterday the optometrist took a picture of the inside of my eyes.
"I usually charge twenty-five dollars for this, but I've got a soft spot for students," she confessed. "I know that you are not in school right now, but since you will be enrolled again in the fall I will cut you some slack."
She spent the next several minutes teaching me about the various parts of my eye and explaining the ways in which pigmentation changes the resulting photographs. Truth be told, the picture of the inside of my eye (please note that the photo I have hyper linked to is not an actual picture of my eye. It is a picture of some sort of plastic eye teaching aid) reminded me of various pictures I have seen of the incubation period of chicken's eggs. I left the optometrist's office eighty dollars poorer (soon to be another five-hundred and forty dollars poorer once my prescription glasses/sun glasses are ready) and with a craving for scrambled eggs.
On the drive home I considered what I would do if a cop pulled me over for speeding and assumed, due to the size of my dilated pupils, that I was high on drugs.


Joseph said...

claim it's a flashback?

Joseph said...

It's strange that jeuvos are eggs in spanish yet that word, juevos, is used coloquially as a term for a man's balls. Not to insinuate that you actually left the optometrist with a hunger for sperm mind you.

Jallápenno said...

I had one eye checked out at an appointment, so just the one was dilated, and I completely looked like I was on crack. I luckily did not get pulled over either.

Jenn said...

I'm glad you told us that the linked picture was only a model, because I was just about to ask you about the wicked awesome '23' tattoo.

Joseph said...

re: wicked 23 tattoo

Megan has always been a big fan of the one and only Michael Jordan, #23 himself. DUH!

Megan said...

When my sister was in Spain she ordered an egg dish, but, due to the texture, she was worried that she may have ordered testicles by mistake.

I think if you get pulled over and only one eye is dilated they would probably call an ambulance because that is a sign of serious head trauma.

I am hardcore. Regular tattoos just don't do it for me. Retinal tattoos are where it is at.