I'm always writing fragments of posts and then stopping, saving them as drafts, telling myself that I will continue them later. I'll write them better later. They'll be funnier if I finish them later. But I never finish them. So I am left with sentences, sometimes paragraphs, that just sit there collecting cyber dust, never to be read by anyone but myself.
Today I decided 'to hell with it! I will copy and paste them all into one post for all the internet to see.' And so that is exactly what I did.

I saw a little boy playing in the bookstore today. He wore a long, flowing cape that floated behind him as he spun around and played. He wasn't loud or obnoxious. He was quiet and careful, and never ventured far from his mother's side. In that moment, he was everything I wanted to be. Minus the cape. No. Wait. Scratch that. He was everything I wanted to be. Only I would have a pink cape.
- Today, 6:30 pm

Sometimes I worry that I will never love anyone as much as I love my dog. Don't get me wrong, he annoys the hell out of me - but now that I have him I feel like I would be lost without him. He never loses patience with me. He never turns me away when I want to cuddle.
- July 4th, 9:31 pm

When I get really drunk I try to wrestle my dog. I don't know why. I just do. Maybe it is because I am overwhelmed with affection for him and I know how much he enjoys playing. Whatever the reason, I've woken up on the kitchen floor many times with various scratches and bruises from our WWF style rumbles. At least I hope that's what they're from.
- June 23rd, 3:27 am

My cat annoys me. My cat annoys me because he does annoying things. He licks plastic. He chews electrical chords. He bites me. He scratches me. He jumps on my head late at night when I am in my bed trying to sleep. In short, he is possessed by the devil. He looks so innocent that it is hard to believe that so much evil can be contained in such a cute, little package.. but it can. It is. The only time that there is any sort of reprieve from the evilness is when he is sleeping, or laying calmly on my bed. I like him most when he is quiet. I like him even more when he is asleep.
- June 17th, 3:51 pm

Long distance relationships are ideal for the commitment phobic, or maybe I should say long distance relationships are ideal for me because I am commitment phobic. I think I am relatively low maintenance when in a relationship. I think I may be a little too low maintenance. I don't like spending hours a day on the phone with anyone, even if I am sleeping with them. I have issues with being accountable to someone else. I don't want to have to call someone to let them know that I am going out of town for the weekend, or that I will be spending more time than usual at the library. I like being able to stretch out in my bed and make my room as hot or as cold as I want it at that particular moment. I like to hog the covers, and I like being able to lay awake in my bed and not feel awkward because there is someone else who is sleeping next to me and I don't want to wake them up. I have never uttered the words "I love you" to anyone other than family or friends, not because I wasn't feeling loving feelings, but because I wanted to be absolutely positively sure that when I said those words I meant them. I have, on at least one occasion, panicked when the guy I was dating expressed those sentiments to me. We'd been dating for a matter of weeks, and I wouldn't be surprised if I left tracks of fire due to the incredible speed with which I ran away from that. Other times, when faced with similar situations, I calmly explain myself. Sometimes people understand things like that, other times they do not. I am not high maintenance, but I admit that it is very probable that I am endlessly frustrating.
- March 30th, 1:29 am

You smell like summer. Like asphalt after the rain. Like cedar crackling on a fire. Like cookies baking. Like clean clothes, fresh out of the dryer. Like my grandma's cooking. Like peppermint tea. Like expensive bubble bath. Like an ocean breeze. You smell like everything I love.
- March 14th, 9:14 am

They say that necessity is the mother of invention, and I'd have to agree. Today, I sat in my living room, holding a bottle of some sort of liquor filled drink and wondered how I would be able to get the top off without going upstairs to find a bottle opener. I looked to my right and saw the seatbelt attachment we'd purchased for my dog sitting on the side table. I picked the the attachment and examined it closely. It was metal and looked like it might be able to do the job, so I tried it. To cut a long story short, I've decided to create and market dog toys that also double as bottle openers.
- February 19th, 6:28 pm

I'm doing laundry. Naked.
- January 11th, 7:14 pm


Just Call Me Fabulous said...

I especially love March 14th and January 11th.

I do the same thing, with the drafts. I'm glad you posted them, that was awesome.

heather said...

posting the drafts is awesome...as a possum. i love shorts...